Holiday day 3

Last night the Pat Pat policy came unstuck, as Bernard cried and cried, totally unable to get to sleep. My book on sleep warns against this policy as it is vEry difficult to be consistent in the middle of the night, and th is was true for me as I was at my wits' end after spending twenty minutes sooThing Bernard, hoping to get more sleep if he weren't screaming,Managing to get him to sleep, creeping out of the room, climbing under my warm duvet, only to have him wake up again five minutes later as i was dropping into a blissful slumber. That was the point at which I had run out of soothing resources, and i phoned Nicholas while he was at his mum's birthday dinner. "I can't go in to him," I said. We just talked for twenty minutes, and it calmed me down. However, Bernard continued to scream, making it a total of 1. Hour and 20 minutes th at time, and that was after a previous hour of screaming. He did not settle at all. I went in to him, finally summoning the energy, and he was asleep within a minute or two. I stayed, slipping into Nicholas' sleeping bag and lying on our wondrous checked carpet. A short while later Bernard was sleeping with me on the floor, and we got maybe 3 or 4 hours like that, till we woke at 7.30
So today Bernard was sleep deprived and behaved terribly badly all day. He managed lunch in two sittings beca use his attention span was affected, but for dinner he could only choke down a few olives, some pieces of cheese and a handful of raisins, throwing his pasta on the floor.
We went to Joma in the morning and met Preston, 3, who very kindly let Bernard play with his Tonka Trucks, but he really wanted them back so we had to leave in a hurry. We got a short nap and then I made a delicious minestrone soup. After that we went to the park, but Bernard mainly sat on my lap when we were there so I didn't see much point in staying long. He practically put himself to bed at 7, he was so exhausted.
Tonight I have no policy. lets just get as much sleep as possible. If I End up on his floor again, it doesn't matter. He must be teething, I guess.

teethsleeptoads

bernard has been working on pushing out the top two teeth.   Nights are much better since I read Dr Marc Weissbluth's book Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Baby.    Now, thanks to the strategies outlined in the book I have been cutting down on the night feeds and Bernard is much easier to get to sleep.   On the night of our farewell gig for Julianne Bernard slept right through while the babysitter was looking after him, i.e. from 8pm to 1am.  This is now pretty normal.  He still feeds at 1, at 4 and at 6 when we wake up.    When he wakes at other times  I tell him to be quiet and go to sleep without even getting up out of bed.  A LOT better than the two-hourly feeds we were used to till recently, and MUCh better than waking up to 20 times a night when he was younger and hungrier. 
he is very talkative and communicative now... even though his vocabulary seems to have shrunk since the spring break, back to Doggy and Woof Woof.   Today he and Aubrey had a little play at school, because I forgot my pump valve, and Aubrey was visiting mum anyway.  So Mindy and I both tried to feed in her room but it was far too exciting for either of them.  Aubrey is an excellent sound mimic, and does maa and growl, moo and roar expertly.  Bernard seemed to copy her roar and I can occasionally get him to roar like a lion these days.  He loves the lion on his little tee shirt and is always looking down at it when he wears it.
We went to the lakeside today and there was a puppy!  Bernard loved it but it played too hard and so he lost interest in it.  He liked watching the older boys Maxim and Arthur playing plastic golf... they were rather distracted by a toad they found jumping in the grass, though; it was a funny game to watch.

seven months is not my favourite

b is in Hilarity mood.  I couldn't keep him off the computer so I made a makeshift playpen in the living room out of blankets - of course he is now trying to crawl through the gap between the shelf and the glass in the coffee table. today we played chase...

that's as far as i got yesterday before i was called away.  it was   a bit optimistic trying to blog with bernard awake in the same room as me!!!

i am at the lowest point so far.  i feel so exhausted i'm dizzy half the time.  bernard is lovely and increasingly mobile but ... i don't know how to get him to sleep through the night.

last night and the previous night he ALSO was unable to go to sleep in the first place; we had an awful evening of screaming.  he fed to sleep and then sat up, and couldn't get back to sleep.  to be honest, I don't mind him waking a few times in the night.  i haven't slept through for 4 months.  if bernard wakes fewer than 3 times a night i am awake waiting for him to feed.  but it gets wearing.  i am tired now.

we are trying to build up solid food during the day but he is not really keen on food.  this evening i got home at 5.30, and fed him at six but it was too late: he barely swallowed a mouthful before spitting it all out and refusing point blank to take anything but a breastfeed followed by falling asleep.  this spells disaster now, as he has slowly been getting worse at night if he misses a meal.  if bernard doesn't get enough solids in the day, he now wakes up to 30 times a night ( i lose count).  there's no way i can follow any 'go to his cot, pat him, cover him and then go back to bed' advice when he wakes that often.  he is just in bed with us. 

and he's teething and has a cold.

moan over.  thanks for listening. hxxxx

playdate

Bernard had his first playdate away from home today:  a visit to Dan and Mindy's house to meet little Aubrey.  Aubrey (a girl!) is one month younger but was so full of beans, and excited as anything to see another baby.  Unfortunately, Bernard was in a bad mood today:  teething, I'm guessing, although no sign of Tooth Number 2. He more or less ignored her, though he deigned to play with her toys - concentrating most on the ones that were the same as his own toys.

We had a lazy day yesterday out of necessity: Nicholas was away last week and exhausted from spending nights on trains, and the weather was a bit too cold for daytrips.  I can't wait to drop into bed; we are doing better with the night waking but last night B was just awake to moan and groan.

motherhood

wow, i forgot to record the first tooth, which was about a week ago.
Right now N is sitting opposite me eating home baked cookies and saying, "I wish I had a Refresh button."  Today I had a massive cook-in:  I boiled up a week's worth of babyfood, baked cookies and made pumpkin and coconut curry for lunch.   It was a good antidote to the cold rainy weather.  We are forecast a week more of continuous rain and flooding.  Bernard is asleep in his cot.  I just got back from going out BY MYSELF to join Emma and friends to celebrate her birthday on Chicken Street.  We had a feast of barbecued chicken, followed by dancing in the street to The Only Way is Up.  I am in charge of putting the video on YouTube.  The motorbikes that went past called us, respectively, "crazy" and "drunk".
I've been wanting to write about Motherhood.  People keep asking me, "So what is motherhood like? Did it come naturally?"  The most general questions are the hardest and I tend to just talk from whatever mood I'm in at that moment.  I guess I was surprised how it didn't all come naturally, and how it has been quite hard, especially the physical act of holding a baby all day.  But now it's getting easier and easier, and baby is so much more responsive to us.  Watching Bernard develop and enjoying his bubbly company has become the most important part of it.  I suppose the hardest part right now is worrying if i am doing the right thing, eg. feeding and watering him correctly, talking to him and stimulating him enough, being strict or gentle enough etc.  I thought that would all come easily but it hasn't.